Get Your Best Valentine’s Card Ever – Guaranteed!

Posted by: michael  :  Category: Uncategorized

What if I told you that I can get a fantastic Valentine’s card any year I choose. In fact, I can guarantee it!

So, this Valentine’s Day while you are anxiously awaiting the arrival of the mailman, I’ll be reading a beautiful card telling me how wonderful I am.

What do you think about that? Think I’m being conceited and arrogant!

Well, you’ve got it all wrong. You see there’s a secret to getting the most ‘feel good’ Valentine’s card ever and here it is… “Write out the card and send it to yourself”.

Okay, so you think that’s not only cheating – it’s stupid too! Oh dear, sorry, but you’re wrong again.

Why? Because I’m using the opportunity to build up my brain. Let me explain. I’ll be using the content I write in the card to build my self-esteem and implant positive affirmations in my subconscious mind. Both stimulate parts of my brain and create, directly or indirectly, new neurons and strengthen connections which in turn may lead to improved brain function.

I explain more of what’s happening in the brain in a moment or two, but in the meantime let’s think about some possible content for the card. By the way, the fact that I’m writing the content rather than a third-party like your mysterious admirer doesn’t devalue it. In fact, if it were an audio card saying good things about yourself recorded in your voice would actually make it more powerful.

So what do I want to say to myself?
Often when we are caught up in the stress and competitiveness of modern life we tend to focus on our shortcomings… I’m the wrong shape, wrong size, keep failing, can’t stop this, can’t do that and so on.

Such negative thoughts can overwhelm the positive things about us. We forget we might have great attributes, for example, of honesty, reliability, awareness, understanding, capable of giving and receiving love.

Valentine’s  Day presents the perfect opportunity (and excuse) to recall just what a fantastic qualities you possess by taking the time to look at yourself and actually write down what it is that makes you special.

But don’t stop there… write down these attributes in your Valentine’s card but don’t post it just yet because there’s more to come.

You see I want to look at what else might be in your fabulous Valentine’s card. When you were reviewing all your attributes, there were probably some areas that you felt you couldn’t truly claim.

Let me give you a personal example: I am not an outgoing sort of person, in fact, I don’t much enjoy crowds so I couldn’t truly claim “I am a people-person” as one of my attributes. However, if I had a mind to, I would write that on my list of attributes that I want to change.

So what’s on your list of attributes you want to have, but presently don’t?
Write them down. Why? Because we can acquire attributes we don’t have by using affirmations.
And before you ask…. No, affirmations are not just New Age hokus- pokus. Affirmations are thoughts, and thoughts are real (electrical impulses) and as such can bring about changes in the brain.

Okay, back to creating your powerful Valentine’s card.
Your card is going to serve two purposes. First, it’s going to help you recall and then reinforce all the wonderful qualities you have and build your self-esteem. Secondly, it’s going to aid you acquire attributes you want to have but don’t at present.  In this regard, be realistic in the sense that you start out small and become more ambitious as you see results. In any event, don’t aim for goals that are clearly unachievable.

Let me give an example… suppose you happen to be seven feet tall and you are tired of people looking at you. There’s little point in affirming that you want to be six feet tall – because it isn’t going to happen.

Okay, it’s time to post your card. Make sure you post it so that it has a good chance of arriving as close to Valentine’s day as possible.

Now it’s arrived how are you going to use it…
To get best results from your card you need to read it out aloud to yourself (I don’t mean shout, but in your normal speaking voice) at least once a day. For your present purposes, hearing your own voice is much more powerful than hearing that of a partner.

In order to cement the attributes you already have in your subconscious mind and want to retain you need to be repetitive So you should read your card at least daily for a month or two.

However, when it comes to getting your ‘want’ list of attributes into your conscious and subconscious mind something in addition to repetition is needed. That extra something is action!

Here’s how I ‘d express the strategy as equations:

            1) Spoken Word + Repetition + Action = Results
            2) Results + Repetition= Brain Change

Why the need for action? Well, I believe you need to actually experience results in order to get your affirmations cemented in the subconscious mind. Once you experience results you get powerful reinforcement of that particular belief or goal such that you reprogram your subconscious mind and delete negative beliefs that relate to that particular goal

Not following affirmations through repeatedly with actions and not actively seeking results in a variety of relevant situations is, in my view, one of the main reasons so many people find affirmations don’t work for them and simply give up.

Anyway, let me go back to my personal example. If you recall, I said that I wasn’t an outgoing type of person. So what action might I take in order to acquire a ‘new’ outgoing me. Perhaps I might join up with a Meet-up group with similar interests to mine. I would try to find all the positives I could in an effort to build up a feel good feeling about group situations. Next I might ‘move’ up to a group that didn’t have similar interests and look for positives there.

By now I might start getting positive results. Maybe I’m starting to think that this group stuff is okay and I’d keep going building on those experiences until it was enjoyable ( repetition of results). At that point my conscious mind would more readily accept positive input related to that goal rather than rejecting it and calling up negative thoughts and consequent responses as it might have done in the past.

While you can perhaps see the need for repetition of action to achieve results (and repetition of results too) there is a limit beyond which you are, so to speak, “whistling in the wind”. For example, if my experiences in the group situations above had been truly and repeatedly negative I need to recognise that despite my best efforts whatever I was trying to achieve isn’t going to happen. To do otherwise would be to endanger both my physical and mental health.

So what’s going on in the brain?
I want to talk briefly about the RAS (the Reticular Activating System). As the name implies the system is primarily involved in activating the brain cortex (our centre for thinking and perceiving). The RAS is a complex system of neurons that is connected to the spinal cord and runs all the way to the mid-brain.

Basically what the RAS does is to filter incoming information –  both external (via sensory system) and internal ( thoughts) and bring to your attention only that which is considered important to you – it’s a sort of selection process.

A simple example that many of us may have experienced relates to buying a car. Often, once you made up your mind to buy a certain make and model of car you start to see them everywhere yet previously you were barely aware of its existence. Put simply, what’s happening is that the acquisition of that type of car has become important to you and  information relating to it is being allowed in and brought to your attention whereas previously it was dismissed as unimportant.

Therein lies a potential problem…
The problem is that the filter system can, if certain beliefs are still strongly held, allow through information related to the very beliefs that we are trying to alter which in turn can lead to responses based on those goals. So, in effect, they are reinforced.

What we need to do is re-program the subconscious mind to accommodate our ‘new’ system of beliefs (goals) and delete those we no longer want to retain. This can best be achieved by repetition of the new belief which will aid the entry of related information into the conscious mind and repeated action and results which help establish the goals in the subconscious mind.

The important point is that not only is input from your senses important in initiating responses but so too are your thoughts. Some responses are rational like letting go of something that’s burning your hand. Some are not, like a belief that you are too fat when you are actually not overweight at all.

But enough of that, the purpose of this post is to alert you to the opportunity (and describe a strategy) you have to use your ‘feel good’ Valentine’s card to  build your self-esteem and get rid of some of your negative beliefs. Deleting negative beliefs and replacing them with appropriate positive goals may help build your brain and enhance its performance.

Valentine’s Day may never be the same again! By the way, don’t forget to put a stamp on your card.   

As always, your comments are very welcome. If you liked this post, please tell your friends about it.

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